Reaching New Heights

Think of your deepest pain or fear. Those are the places we tend to think God cannot go, for if we let him go there, we would be healed. God is most fully real and himself in the worst parts of our lives, but letting go at the point when you feel the most fear and pain is difficult. Oddly enough, we prefer to hold onto our fear and pain because they keep us in control. Trusting at those points is like letting go when the source of your pain and fear is just before you; you tend to ...  Keep reading

God Is System

How profound the thought that God, within himself, is relationship. He is greater than the sum of his parts. He is not Father, Son, or Holy Spirit. He is all and the interactions which occur between. He is always moving and his character is tied up in the ongoing dance. As well, we ourselves can never cease being in relationship. Just try to live apart from others. Even saying you are going to become “independent” is a relational position.

Remember, too, that what you see before you ...  Keep reading

The Stories We Tell Ourselves

The stories we tell ourselves are very important. I heard someone say once that the thing that separates humans from animals is that we as humans attach meaning to our experiences. Think about it: an animal encounters stress in the form of a predator and acts on instinct to get away or fight and probably does not give it much thought after that. But think about what we tell ourselves when we encounter lesser threats: “I’m never going to catch up on things,” “life is not turning out the way I planned,” “I’m a failure,” “God is punishing me,” “I can’t handle this,” “life is not worth living.” The list is endless. What we call stress is not the physiological responses we have to threat or difficulty; it is the stories we tell ourselves and the meaning we abstract in difficult circumstances. These are what weigh us down and erode our well-being. If we avoid telling ourselves these negative stories, we can use our body’s stress reaction to help ratchet up our performance. The anxiety is there to help you pay attention and be able to perform at a high level. If you allow it to do so, you can meet the challenge and then allow yourself to “come back down” when you need to. Consider some different meanings we can assign to our difficulty: “God trusts me to handle this,” “I must be important enough to encounter this hard thing,” “my life must be worth something,” “this is just another challenge that will soon pass,” “there must be something important to take from this,” “my body is wired to help me meet this challenge,” “pain is the way I grow.” These are not just positive reframes to help us feel better. I think they are actually true.

Listen For The Sound

If you listen, you can connect with this voice which is underneath all the things that normally fill our senses. It is happening on a different wavelength, a different plane, but you can tune in to it if you have some patience. All the things right in front of us and all the things people are saying tend to distract us from it and sometimes we forget it is there, but our minds and souls are meant to be in a state of resonance with it. Call it the real reality, call it process, call it “what ...  Keep reading

Dark Nights (Plural)

You have heard it talked about that most people go through some kind of “dark night of the soul” at some point in their lives. Well I don’t know about you, but I feel like I go through some kind of depression/darkness almost monthly (if not more often) when I feel depressed and it feels like there was no way to avoid it. I just need to be depressed, something needs to die.

My wife told me last week too that babies go through a fussy period when they are getting ready to move through ...  Keep reading

Rest Is Coming

It is also true that rest awaits. I believe C.S. Lewis said somewhere that man has the capacity to endure suffering only as long as he has to – that once the suffering has ended, he will have the experience that he could not have possibly endured one minute more. This is the other thing that makes our suffering bearable: we know there is respite when it is finished.  This day will end at some point and you will be able to sleep. This ...  Keep reading

Freedom In Suffering

I have long been fascinated by and drawn to stories of people who have suffered greatly and yet live free. That’s why my favorite movie is The Shawshank Redemption. I heard once that Nelson Mandela was able to find a sublime level of peace in his soul while imprisoned. You have probably heard similar stories. I have even wished suffering upon myself at times because in suffering, we learn who we truly are and what really matters in life bubbles to the surface. Weird, right?

We cannot really ...  Keep reading

Grace For All

Grace is the only real transformative currency. You have probably learned by now that judging, criticizing and shaming people does not really produce great results. It may change people’s behavior, but in the long run, it just produces more and more shame. You shame your kids, then  they feel ashamed and shame their kids. The way out is to find grace for yourself, and you will at that same time find it for others. To some of you, this may seem like cheap grace or “letting people off ...  Keep reading